The Holy Empire of Bethesda Scamville is a huge, socially progressive nation, ruled by jimbis 9000 with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 769 million Bethesda Scamvilleans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rockville. The average income tax rate is 48.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Bethesda Scamvillean economy, worth 97.7 trillion caps a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 126,990 caps, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

One of the nation's leading exports is empty platitudes, the military has declared that 'a woman's place is in the mess hall', immigrants who carry knives on them are presumed to be chefs, and a National Academy regulates grammar and usage. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bethesda Scamville's national animal is the nuke.

Bethesda Scamville is ranked 36,726^th in the world and 60^th in Conch Kingdom for Most Corrupt Governments, with 59.2 kickbacks per hour.